Language of Blink

While I was with Mom today she looked a bit bored. I would be bored too in a room in which I couldn't talk, couldn't watch TV, and couldn't read. I have been trying to find things to read to Mom, but I haven't had much luck. In the latest book "Julia Speaks Her Mind" we are just now to chapter 4. I am not sure if Mom doesn't like it or if we get interrupted by personnel so much she cannot follow the story line. It is a charming book about a lady from the south who finds herself with a deceased husband, more money than she knows what to do with, and an unexpected 9 year old who happens to be the son of her dead husband that she didn't know about.

Mostly, I just held her hand today. She was more awake. She could nod, squeeze my hand, and move both legs. (I hadn't asked her to do this, but the doctor said I should. He wanted to have her show off for me.) Sometimes she still blinks really hard to try to tell me something. I still don't understand the language of blink, but I try.

I also took off her restraints one at a time. She has been restrained since she got to the hospital because everyone is afraid that she will pull out her tubes and things. While the restraint was off I put lotion on her arm, made sure the hospital bracelets were not digging into her skin and just let her move a bit. If it were me, I would want to stretch. Mom didn't move much when the restraint was off. I think she probably knew that I was afraid that if she did pull something out - I would be the one to get in trouble. So, we just sat there. Really, neither of us was sitting. I have to stand. (It is a rule I am not fond of in ICU.) Mom was laying down. Mom didn't move much, just held my hand.

Sometimes when I am with her I don't really know what to say. When this first happened I wanted to tell her many, many things. As this is progressing, I think we will have time for those things later. I want to ask her so many things, too. She cannot talk for now, though. And the little day to day things don't really seem to matter much. I just want her to get better.

I had to leave the hospital today about 3:15 to head back down to pick up the kids. I left my mom with Blake Utley. I was glad that he came to visit when he did. Dropping Luke off this morning was difficult for me -- just as hard as leaving Mom at the hospital tonight. I feel torn between the two.

The kids were wonderful when I picked them up!

I am sure you all want to know - Luke did very well at daycare. (Did anyone expect any less from one of my children??) He stayed on schedule and was sweet the entire day. Avery even got to check on him before her nap today. As always she commented "He's such a cutie!"

We spent the afternoon together like always. Luke had a lot to say to both Avery and me. I was happy to hear every gurgle (from Luke) and giggle (from Avery) as she translated from "baby talk" into kid's speak for me.

Daddy went to the hospital this evening. I called a bit ago for an update on Mom and to make sure he was not staying the night. He promised me that he wouldn't. Daddy and I have decided to sleep at home while she is in ICU. We will sleep up there again when she moves to a regular room and is not as well attended.

Mom MAY get her breathing tube out tomorrow. It has been bothering her all day. It is quite a discomfort. She will go for a CAT scan about 3 am to see a clear picture of her brain. Since she had the valve on her brain shunt closed today (skull pressure was normal or below), the doctors wanted to see how her brain handled it. If her brain looks like it can handle the pressure well, they will take out the breathing tube because they will no longer need it.

I feel this could really help Mom.

Thank you all for the calls, blog posts, e-mails, gifts, cards, and prayers! I find that God takes care of us in many ways - and for now, he is using all of you. Thank you all so very much! Please continue to pray for my family.

As for people who will stay with Mom next week during the day - I will get the list together by Wednesday at the latest. I will let everyone know then. Thanks!