Celebration of Life

Just in case anyone is still out there....

The celebration of Life for my mother is being held this Saturday, May 2, 2009. We will host it at the "Midlothian Conference Center." Midlothian, TX.

The celebration will run from 4 to 6 pm and is a come and go event.

Heidi is really planning most of it. I am just helping here and there. We are curious about numbers because we are serving appetizers and snacks. IF you have not gotten an Evite from me - please email me at aclark78@hotmail.com. IF you haven't gotten an e-mail it is because of an oversight and not because we don't value your friendship.

The celebration is one for my mom, but it is also one to say thank you to all of you who have prayed for her along the way. We never would have made it through all of this without you!

Please come and celebrate with us!

Released!

Avid readers - here is another update in the story of Mom.  

Mom and Daddy went to the doctor today for a check up.  This is Dr. Porter.  He was the doctor overseeing her case since she went to the rehabilitation center.

Dr. Porter got reports from Mom's speech therapist and physical therapist (Ethan).  The speech therapist at Baylor may release Mom as early as Friday.  We will have to wait a bit longer for Ethan to release her.  She is still working on balance and stability.

With the reports sounding positive, Dr. Porter decided to release Mom!  She can go back to work.  Mom is not sure of the exact start date but we anticipate it could be in the next two weeks.  

Mom is a bit worried that she will be very tired if she works all day.  I think that at the end of every day most of us are very tired.  I think she will not be the only one.

Things are going very well.  Mom still cannot drive and I really want to thank all of her friends who have helped get her to and from appointments.  You helped my father and I out a lot by driving her where she needed to go when we couldn't.

Thank you to all who have brought food and prayed for my mom.  Without you, we would be in really bad shape!  

The story of Mom batteling her brain tumor seems to be coming close to an end.  I am not done writing yet.  I will post more about Mom's progress as it comes available.  Anything newsworthy - I will post.  Just check once a week or so.  

I will post more details about the May 2nd celebration soon.  Please come!  We would love to see you and thank you in person for helping our family!  

On a side note.  You have been so kind to pray for my mom.  Just as her story is winding down, I have another friend in need of your prayers.  Our best friend has a four year old daughter who is currently in Cook Medical Center batteling for her life.  She was admitted on Sunday.  The doctors don't know what is wrong.  She is on life support.  We pray that she will live and be healed completely.  You can follow her blog at this spot:  www.godsavetrinity.blogspot.com

Thank you! 

I know I should be blogging everyday.  Instead, at least for last week, I just posted tonight.  Please forgive me.  Sometimes I just don't know exactly what to say.

Mom is doing well.  She is out of the hospital and trying to get back to "normal life."  We are not sure what that will be, but we are all anxious to find out.

This week was the week I had to go back to work after Spring Break.  Each morning at 6:30 I would find Mom and take her blood sugar level.  Then, by 6:45 the kids, Ethan and I were gone for the day.  Daddy is usually not far behind us.  

Mom had to go to speech therapy twice during the school day.  One day Daddy was able to take her and the next day one of her friends could.  The speech therapy hours are during school hours and I am unable to help.  If you are able to take Mom to Baylor during the day and would like to help out in that way - please let Mom and Daddy know.  The therapy lasts one day for an hour and the second visit is only 30 minutes.  

For those of you who have spoken to my mom on the phone - you probably think my mom doesn't need speech therapy.  Mom sounds good, but she is working with the speech therapist on language and reasoning skills.  She will do things for memory, too.  The speech therapist even gave her homework to help her work with her memory.  I have to tell her 10 words that are largely unrelated.  Each word I say has to be about 5 seconds apart.  She has to then wait 5 minutes and tell me as many words as she can remember.  I do have cues for her if she needs help.  Believe it or not - it isn't easy.

Physical therapy is going very well.  Mom doesn't need her walker much anymore inside of her house.  When she is outside or away from the house - she needs it.  For now they are renting a wheelchair just in case she wants to "shop."  But it is rarely used because Mom doesn't want to be out that long.  Mom and Daddy went to Brookshires just this evening and Daddy took her in without her walker to get just a couple of things - Mom did well.  Her body is mending quickly and getting stronger each day.  

Ethan, the kids and I are not going to live with Mom this week.  After two weeks at Mom's, Avery is begging to go home to her bed.  I am still going to cook for her, clean when she needs me to, and take her to physical therapy 3 times a week.  I am also going to invite her to our house on the evenings we don't have to go to therapy.  

Mom would love some visitors.  If you decide you would like to visit her during the day, please call first.  She wants to make sure she will be there before you come.  (She doesn't want to miss someone while she is going to therapy.)  Mom loves to talk to people and with Daddy and I at work - she misses that interaction.  Also, please let the phone ring many times if you call her.  You might even call back a second time if it goes to voice mail.  Mom is having a hard time getting to the phone when it rings.  She has a cordless phone, but doesn't like to leave it off the hook for fear it will run out of batteries or it will be lost....

Thank you for taking the time to read the blog and pray for my family.  Thank you for caring so much!  I will post again sometime this week - lets say by Friday?  

"Prayers Got Me Through"

Mom is doing well today.  She is beginning to fall back into her old patterns again.  For example, my mom is really not a napper.  Today - she was too busy to take a nap.  It was completely her.  Even in college I planned my days around naps.  So today - I took Mom to speech therapy in downtown Dallas followed by lunch at Bueno and two drive through errands.  After which Mom really wanted to stop by Daddy's office to see him.  

At Daddy's office we ran into her friends the Van Amburghs.  Mom got to visit with them a few minutes before Luke began to cry (because the car wasn't moving).  We jumped into the car and went home.  It took me about a half hour to put Avery down for a nap.  Luke took a bit longer but by 3:00 all were in bed - except for Mom.  I left her on the couch and tried to catch some sleep myself.  When I awoke, she was still in the living room.  She had written down recipes from the Internet to try, written one or two thank you notes, checked the blog (I have to be careful with what I say now - Mom is a follower... ) and she had watched some TV.  

She soon had a visit from two more of her friends bringing food and smiles.  The visit really picked her spirits up.  We had a family dinner and then put the kids to bed.  

All in all - a very good day!  

I was most excited about her blood sugar level.  She didn't always let me test her.  In fact, she only let me test her once today (should be four times), but when I did - before dinner- her blood sugar level was 94!  It hasn't been normal in the evening until tonight.  

More about speech therapy - Mom's first day was today.  We were unsuccessful at locating a speech therapist near us that was able to see new patients.  SO, Mom is taking speech therapy from Baylor Rehab downtown.  (This was the last building she stayed in, but she will now be working with their outpatient department.)  The therapist is young.  Every time Mom tells about therapy she comments on how young the therapist is.  I didn't go into therapy with her because I had the kids and this was the day of evaluation for Mom.  I didn't want Mom to be distracted by the children.  So, while Avery, Luke and I looked for acorns and smelled flowers around the hospital enjoying the sunshine - Mom sat in a room with this lady and took tests.  She told me about a test for visual discrimination (like which object is different), a test for making a schedule, and a test for comprehension (she had to read a passage and then answer questions).  When Mom got home she said her head really hurt.  She blamed it on Ethan (for therapy the day before), Avery being too noisy, and speech (because she was concentrating so hard).  Even with a headache she didn't want to take pain meds because we think they make her sick.  Next week she will go three times to speech.  The first one, Daddy will be at.  The therapist wants to speak with him about goals.  At that meeting they may talk about not having to see Mom three times a week.  The therapist seems to think Mom might not need that many times each week.  She is going to e-mail the suggestion to have less speech therapy each week to the doctor who is currently on vacation out of the country.  

Physical therapy.  Mom went on Wednesday to physical therapy.  Ethan only had her there about 45 minutes.  He worked her hard, though during that time.  One of my favorite things they did was to have Mom stand without the walker and we played "balloon volleyball."  Avery was able to begin to hit the balloon to Mom, but when we found her aim wasn't great - I got to.  I am very good at "balloon volleyball".  It is a talent I didn't know I had.  Mom did very well, too.  She was able to reach up with both of her hands at different times and hit the balloon back to me.  

For tomorrow - Mom will go to physical therapy in the morning and then the beauty shop in the late afternoon.  (Remember, I plan for naps.)  Ethan, Avery, Luke and I are going to go home tomorrow.  Avery really misses her bed.  Daddy's brother (Uncle Bobby) and his son (Spencer) are coming for the weekend.  We should be back at Mom's house on Sunday evening.  

Mom was talking on the phone earlier.  She said something that stuck with me that I wanted you all to hear.  Mom was talking to her friend and said, "Prayers are what have gotten me through this so far."  She is right.  We have all been praying and God listened to us.  Thank you so very much for praying for my mom.  She thanks you, too.   Isn't prayer amazing?

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Today was a good day.  So far, I think it was the best one since the hospital.  Mom woke up and took most of her medicine and even let me get her blood sugar levels!  

Best of all - she got a hair cut!  She went to her hair place - "One Fine Day" in Waxahachie.  There, she left me in the waiting area with the kids (Avery did wonderfully and Luke slept) while she went back with Jeff.  When I went to check on her Jeff commented that she had talked the whole time.  She said, "Well, I haven't seen anyone except Amy lately."  I think she misses visiting with the visitors at the hospital.  Thank you all for coming to visit her there!  Thank you also for calling Mom and talking with her.  Her phone was broken on Saturday and not fixed until today.  I am sorry if you called and got voice mail.  

Another wonderful thing that happened today was the 10:00 therapy session.  (We were only 30 minutes late.)  Thank goodness we have a forgiving therapist (my husband, Ethan.)  

Here is all about therapy today in his words:  I haven't seen Debbie "do therapy" for about 2 weeks and even though I had observed her moving around the house some, we really hadn't had a chance to talk about how she was doing since the hospital.  Last night I was able to read over some of her previous therapists' reports in the info we received from BIR, so that was a good benchmark for me to compare how she was today to 1-3 weeks ago.  We talked a great deal today about how she was feeling and what she felt her limitations are.  I felt that she moves in general, better than i anticipated and her static (not moving) balance was better than advertised. She does however have a great deal of Left arm weakness and neck/shoulder pain and tightness. We went over a few arm and leg strengthening exercises and scheduled her for more treatments later in the week. By the end of her time she complained of a good deal of dizziness as well as muscle fatigue and neck pain. We discussed her goals concerning her walking without an assistive device and her long term plans. She was a model patient and it was a good start to her outpatient therapy. I have already drawn up some homework for her and I will treat her again tomorrow afternoon. :)

Monday - March 16th

Mom was still sick today.  The doctor called in medication for her.  Hopefully she will feel better tomorrow.

10:00 am - Physical Therapy begins again. (Ethan will be her therapist.)

Good things that happened today:

1. The sun shined and it was a warm spring day.  It was the perfect weather to begin Spring Break! 

2.  Mom held Luke many times and was able to hold him for longer than 10 minutes.  She used to complain at how heavy he was and want someone to take him.  Today - I asked her if he was too heavy several times before she gave him up.  (Point - Mom's arms are getting stronger.)

3.  I talked with Mom for a long time this morning and for brief moments I even forgot she had gone through the hospital stuff.  She just sounded like Mom.

4.  The kids are at my house while I am at Mom's.  They are staying with my mother-in-law until after therapy. (Point - even though I won't get to see them tomorrow morning - I will get a full nights sleep.  Maybe.)

Funny

Not much happened today.  It was a quiet Sunday.  Quiet Sundays are the best in my opinion.  Avery, Luke and I headed off to church.  We went to class and then late service.  Luke was awake the whole time, but an angel.  Avery was a bit wiggly.  After church we came home and ate lunch.  Mom still doesn't feel well and didn't join us at the table.  

After lunch we napped.  Luke was awake, though.  He wanted to play.  I wrestled with him for awhile and then Daddy took over.  Daddy said they enjoyed a bit of "Wyatt Earp" while the rest of us slept.  Great boy time.  

When Luke went to sleep - Daddy headed to work for a little while and shortly after he left, Ethan came home!  I was glad to see him!  He shaved the beard that he had been growing since Luke was born.  He looks nice - with or without the beard. 

Tomorrow we don't have much planned for Mom.  We are going to switch her physical therapy from big Baylor to Ethan's clinic.  Ethan has more flexible hours and his clinic is closer.  We will switch the paperwork tomorrow.  If it happens early enough - Mom might have a chance to have therapy tomorrow.  We will wait and see.  

Funniest thing that happened today was when Mom decided to get up off the couch and go back to her bedroom.  Ethan - who hasn't really been around her since last weekend - stood up to help her.  Mom said, "I can do this, Ethan.  I feel very comfortable with doing this by myself."  Then with a small grin on her face she showed Ethan how she could get up and begin to walk with her walker.  Quietly, Ethan followed behind her.  I am sure in his head he was thinking of things to work on for therapy.  When Mom walked into the kitchen she says to Daddy, "Dick, Ethan is following me."  

I cannot wait to see the "therapy" sessions!

Please pray that Mom begins to feel better.  She doesn't think she has a virus, she thinks she just overdid things yesterday when she was packing to get ready to go.  I am very ready for her to feel more like she used to. 

Tie a yellow ribbon on the old oak tree....

This morning began for me about 5:45 am.  The kids and I moved into Mom's house yesterday evening and Luke didn't sleep hardly at all.  He wasn't really cranky, just awake every hour or so.  He even woke Daddy up a few times.  Thankfully, Avery slept through most of it.  At about 6:30 after feeding him again - I decided I should just be up for the day.  

I fixed breakfast for Daddy and Avery and we all sat around the breakfast table (all except for Luke who decided he was tired...) and talked about today's events.  Daddy loves breakfast time and he was very glad to share his table with two morning people.  We were all very excited to have Mom come home!  

After breakfast Daddy headed off to the store and Avery, Luke and I finished getting ready.  Daddy had gone to buy roses for Mom for the house and also yellow ribbons because of an old song.  When Mom saw the yellow ribbons she told me to take a picture of them.  She was also excited about the roses on the table.  

Let me get back to the morning.  Luke, Avery, Daddy and I all piled into the car and set off for the hospital.  We found Mom in her room standing up with her walker and walking around trying to pack.  She was glad we were there to take her home.  Avery was a flutter. Luke's stroller was too big - so we set him outside the door.  While Daddy packed and carted things off to the car - I tried to control the kids.  Mostly Avery.  She has been sick for 3 days before this and other than going through the drive through at Sonic or over to Mom's she has been inside.  She had some energy to let out.  Unfortunately, we didn't know this until we got to the hospital.  When a doctor came by to talk with Mom and Daddy - I took Avery and Luke around the floor of the building.  To distract Avery I taught her to control Luke's stroller (which she cannot see over.)  This came in handy later...

After visiting with her nurse and getting all directions for medications - we went on our way. Daddy wanted to visit all of the people he now calls friends that we have met since our time began at Baylor  8 1/2 weeks ago.  Two of my favorites are on the same floor as Mom at the rehab center.  One lady named Lucy came in because her husband had an accident during the ice storm.  She, Ethan and I got to spend the night at the hospital together and we became fast friends.  The other, Mrs. Berry is a very kind lady!  She also came in because of the ice storm.  Her husband was walking into work and slipped on the ice and bumped his head.  Both ladies have been friends to our family through all of this.  I am very glad to have met them! 

Daddy then thought we should go and see other nurses on other floors - people who helped Mom that she may or may not remember.  He wanted to tell them thank you and also show Mom off.  He wanted to let them know that she is going home and what they did for her got her to this point.  BUT - as we started out for the underground tunnel from the rehab hospital to the regular hospital things began to happen.  

Picture this - Daddy has a plant and coat in one hand and some other things from Mom's room in the other hand.  (His last load for the car.)  I was pushing Luke with my jacket and Avery's across the top of the stroller.  Mom was pushing herself some and I was pushing her, too.  I would push Luke, come back - push Mom, etc.  Avery decided to help and we thought it was best for her to push Luke and not Mom.  So then - we are going behind Daddy and Avery is pushing Luke, I am pushing Mom into the elevator that will take us to the basement.  While we are there - Mom's huge glass of ice water spills off of the stroller we forgot it was on that was pushed by Avery.  Daddy then decides he needs to push Luke and juggle the things in his hands.  Avery goes between us - sometimes pulling on my shirt, sometimes "helping" Daddy push the stroller all the while wearing a CLEAN bed pan on her head.  I can only imagine how we looked. We went to the third floor of Truett first and didn't see anyone at first.  We finally saw one nurse.  At this point - the kids are hungry and tired and so is Mom.  We call it a day and go back down the tunnel to the car.  

We get into the car and it is stuffed with all of the things we have.  Wheelchair, walker, stroller, a plant, etc.  Daddy decides we need to call Heidi.  She needed to be part of the moment, too.  He dials her as he is pulling out of the parking lot, in the backseat I am reading to Avery and Luke is talking (not a quiet car)  -- when all of the sudden -  Mom feels sick.  

We pull over, help Mom and then make other plans for lunch.  The original one was going to Pappadouxs.  We decide to call ahead and get take out.  After getting take out from there we went by a chicken place for tea.  (Really good tea, but Dad noticed that a gallon of tea there costs more than a gallon of milk. - Not sure we will go there for tea again.)  Then home.  We ate a wonderful lunch - all of us at the table.  (Except for Luke who was again - asleep.) 

After lunch I fed Luke and then Mom, Avery, and I tried to lay down to take a nap.  Luke didn't want to sleep - he wanted to talk - so he and Daddy spent some boy time together before Luke decided to lay down, too.

Dinner was more quiet.  Mom still felt sick.  She didn't eat.  Daddy, Avery and I had popcorn and hot dogs.  I went to the store after the kids were in bed.  

At times today I had no idea if I was helping or creating more of a problem with the kids around.  Ethan would have been here - but nobody knew when Mom would get out of the hospital and he had a business trip scheduled for Houston this weekend.  Thankfully - he will be back tomorrow.  

Daddy is who I found myself watching today the most.  We all are a little different because of this event.  I have told Daddy and Heidi that I think the three of us are closer now than we were.  Daddy did what he always does today - he visited.  He laughed, he showed his family off, and he celebrated with anyone who wanted to celebrate.  We are lucky.  So many of the people we met didn't get happy endings.  Mom is one of the lucky ones.  Of course - she is not at the end of her story or her journey yet.  

Mom's therapy today- she got to hold Luke.  She got to get in and out of the car and go home.  When she got home she got out of the car very quickly!  Mom didn't feel well today, but we think that was from motion sickness and trying to do too much packing this morning.  Tomorrow is another day....

On May 2nd (Saturday) we are having a party to celebrate Mom's recovery.  All blog readers are invited.  You have been praying for my mom and we want to thank you.  More will be posted about the event as it gets closer - just save the date on the calendar, please.  It was supposed to be a surprise for Mom, but Daddy couldn't keep it a secret.

As for the blog.  For now I will write.  This week will be filled with eye doctor appointments, physical therapy (maybe done by my husband, Ethan), grand kid time, and other normal everyday things.  I will keep you posted.  

Something you can do for me - I am going to cook for Mom this week especially because I have Spring Break.  I am not a cook.  I have about 5 recipes that I cook all of the time and that is it.  I am needing help to get better.  I am looking for healthy recipes that I can cook and then maybe put in the freezer so that when I am not here on the weekends or in a few weeks - Mom can pull them out and cook them and have a good hot dinner.  SO - if any of you know these recipes - post them on the blog OR e-mail aclark78@hotmail.com.  Also - any tips for storing frozen meals like this?  Thanks so much for your help! 

Meeting - 10:30ish

We had another meeting with all of the important people on Mom's case this morning.  I wasn't there (Avery has strep), but Daddy called me and wanted to make sure I put it on the blog quickly.

Mom WILL be released at 10:00 on Saturday morning.  We will go and pick her up and she can stay at home!  It has been 8 weeks of hospital and rehab up to now - so we are going to be very happy for her to come home.  

Mom will continue to have therapy as an outpatient.  For now, we think she will go to Baylor for her therapy needs.  She will see a speech therapist and a physical therapist.  She will be there for an hour 3 times a week. Mom is working with the speech therapist on cognitive therapy and speech and the physical therapist for things like balance.

Mom will not have to be with someone all of the time when she comes home.  For the first week she will be with the kids and me.  We have Spring Break so we are going to celebrate at Mom's house.  After next week, both Daddy and I are just about 10 minutes away if she needed us.  For now it looks like Ethan, the kids and I will be staying at Mom's during the week and then at our house Friday and Saturday nights.  This way - I can worry about only cleaning, cooking, and washing for one house - not two.  It is also more stability for the children.  They will not have to go over to Mom's house each afternoon - and then leave a few hours later.  We can keep their eating and sleeping patterns the same.  We will also have the longest "family" times which are Friday night and Saturdays to ourselves.  We are taking it a week at a time, though.  If we are not needed to help with Mom then we will go home.  

Mom can talk on the phone now.  Her cell phone is 972-743-6552.  She would love to hear from you.  Today, Thursday and Friday - please only call between 4:30 and 7:30.  This gives Mom a chance to finish with therapy and rest for a bit before visiting.  

I will keep you posted if anything changes, but for now Mom is still in rehab.  I will post something on Saturday evening to let you know how her first day home went.  

Thank you all for your prayers - they are working!

The little things....

I was really, really tired on Sunday!  Loosing an hour stinks!  Ethan, Avery, Luke and I went to church with Ethan's mom who was visiting for the weekend.  We went to late service (which we never do).  Just before we went in the doors, Daddy was coming out after class.  He couldn't stay any longer.  He wanted to be with Mom.  

I didn't go and see Mom.  We had company and I had many things to do for school.  Thanks to may WONDERFUL husband - I got a nap and a bit caught up on things.

Daddy took Mom to Target and got a few things she had been wanting.  She was even able to get a frame for a picture of my kids that she ordered in December.  (I am sure she will show you the picture if you visit.)  

Mom and Daddy also visited with Blake and Sandy Utley at On the Boarder.  (Visiting for about 2 hours - away from the hospital.)  

Many things Mom has done this past weekend really made her tired.  I continue to think of all of the things I do each day that I take for granted.   Getting out of bed, up and down into a chair, navigating through a crowd -- all become major events.

Next weekend Mom is still scheduled to go home.  We are very, very, very happy!  

This week there is a meeting sometime to confirm that mom is going home.  (I think the meeting is Wednesday - so check the blog either late that day or on Thursday.)  Unless I hear anything new - Mom is still just rehabilitating! 

Thank you for all of the food, cards, calls, gifts, and prayers.  I am very glad that you are helping us through this difficult time!  Words cannot express how thankful we are that you are around to help us! 

Weekend Pass....

Well, not the whole weekend, but at least for today Debbie was able to leave the rehab hospital and spend the day at home. At 11 am Dick and Amy went to a class to learn the proper ways to help Debbie while she is outside of rehab, such as transfers in and out of the car and how to fold and transport her wheelchair and walker. A physical therapist at BIR instructed them and then it was out into a warm, windy March Saturday!
First stop was for lunch at Pappadaeux (not sure if i spelled that right). Debbie had a Greek salad and some gumbo. They raised some eyebrows with the wheelchair and Debbie's appearance but they enjoyed themselves and Debbie didn't seem to notice. Then it was on to home! It was obviously the first time Debbie has been in her house since she collapsed on January 21st. Debbie spent some time looking for things that have been missing or misplaced during her absence then felt tired and wanted to nap for a bit. Following her nap Amy and Debbie made a stop at Sonic (of course) then skipped a planned trip to Target because Debbie was too tired.
Debbie is now in room #312 in BIR. It's a private room and she is happy to have full control of the thermostat and can watch her own TV without disturbing a roommate. She enjoyed her time out but was exhausted by the end of the day. When Amy left Debbie had everything she needed and was very tired and sore. She is allowed to take a day trip tomorrow as well but is unsure of whether she will venture out tomorrow.

THE meeting

Between 10:35 and 11:00 we were to have a meeting with everyone involved in Mom's case.  The meeting was only to last about 5 minutes and then we were going to know everything we needed to know about Mom.  ALL of our questions were going to be answered.   

I called Daddy (during my planning time) at 10:35.  This is the longest we have talked for awhile.  We talked on the phone and speculated about when Mom would be allowed to come home.  We talked about options - all while we waited for the meeting to happen.  You COULD say that Daddy got to the meeting early, I was on time, and all of the doctors were late.  They didn't show up until 11:10 and our window of time was closing rapidly.  (Daddy had a 12:00 appointment in Midlothian and I had to go and pick up my students at 11:20.)  

When they got there, Daddy and the doctors went to find Mom (who had gone to therapy).  This took a few minutes, but then we were all ready.  

The doctors said that Mom is working on "endurance" and "stamina."  She doesn't like to hold her head up on her own for long periods of time.  She doesn't like to turn her head either because she doesn't like the way the shunt feels in her neck. 

The doctors talked about wanting to see some of Mom's work things.  They have to decide if and when she is ready to go back to work.  Before they decide that, they have to figure out what she does.

Mom told them all she wanted to do was go home.  The doctors said that they would give her a "weekend pass."  They will allow her to visit on Saturday and then again on Sunday.  We are not sure about the details.  We don't know if Mom can go away all day or if she will only be allowed out for a few hours.  Daddy did mention church on Sunday (he misses holding her hand during service).  We will have to see how Mom feels.  She is not sure she can sit through church yet.

Ethan and I are going to help out quite a bit when Mom comes home.  We only live a few miles from them, but when we picked our house I wanted it to be as far away from Mom and Dad as possible.  Now, it seems like that is the most annoying part.  I feel like they are close, but it takes 20 minutes to cross town and get there.  We may stay there for a few nights out of the week.  Ethan works until 8 pm on those nights.  This will give me the added benefit of cleaning only one house and worrying about only one meal each night.  Also - when it is time for the kids to go to bed, I won't have to worry about rushing home to put them down.  Also - Daddy's busy season is starting.  He may be late some nights.  We may not do this long, but we might need to do it for awhile.  On the weekends when we usually spend our "family" time together - Ethan, Avery, Luke and I will be at home.  Of course we will visit Mom during the weekend, too.

Mom cannot drive for awhile.  This surprised Daddy.  Mom and Dad are most concerned about transportation when Mom goes back to work.  She teaches the blind and travels from school to school to ARDS and to see children.  They are not sure what she will do if she cannot drive.

When released Mom will do "outpatient" physical therapy.  Ethan does this type of therapy and has been requested by Mom.  I am excited - mostly because I know he will do a good job but also because I know he will work with my schedule.....

Big news - one week from this Saturday - Mom will be released!  (This is still just a guess.  Next meeting is next week.)  

Tonight, Mom, Daddy and I talked with Heidi on speaker phone.   Heidi talked and talked while she was grocery shopping in Nashville, TN.  It was very nice to have Mom, Daddy, and Heidi together.  We laughed and enjoyed each other.  

Thank you all for continuing to pray for Mom!  She is getting better each day.  

Mom played solitaire and lost...

I talked to Mom on the way home from school today, a daily tradition. She talked about her day and how she is busy from 7:30 to 2:30 every day with all sorts of therapists. One thing she mentioned she did today was play solitaire (this isn't a comment meant to guilt you into visiting her). Mom likes to play games by herself (solitaire, tetris, etc). She said she played solitaire with different rules today and that she had lost. Mom talked about going back to work and speculated on when she can go home from rehab, she thinks this week, we think next week. Considering spring break is coming up, maybe the extra week would be better. We will have a short "care team" meeting tomorrow morning to discuss Mom's progress, goals, and treatment plan.

Let's get Moving!

Avery, Luke and I visited Mom yesterday. 

Avery watched cartoons while Mom held Luke.  It is the first time she has been able to hold him for more than 10 minutes and not tell me that her arms hurt.  She played with him.  She moved his arms and legs to show me how the PTs moved her arms and legs that day during therapy. 

It was very nice to see her!  Her therapy times are from about 8 to 3 each day.  She was very tired yesterday afternoon after all of the movement.

There will be a short meeting between all doctors, speech therapists, OTs, and PTs and all of the other important people - Daddy will be there, too.  I hope to listen on speaker phone.  We will listen to goals and possible discharge dates. 

These are good days! 

the "midst of rehabilitation"

I didn't update yesterday.  Sorry.  Avery and I had a girls day.  We had to go shopping for her clothes because she has grown out of everything!  We looked and looked, but I could only find 3 dresses that I liked for her.  I also got an outfit that looks exactly like what I would wear - plain navy shirt and green kakis.  It was not intentional. Unfortunately all I found was sleeveless.  I will try again today....

We did swing by the hospital for an hour or so.  We brought Mom her new favorite ice cream - peppermint from a place called "Wild About Harry's".  We shared it with everyone around.  

I found it nice that Mom's next door neighbor was a man who's wife I met in the waiting room in ICU.  He had a horrible accident during the ice storm.  Ethan and I spent a couple of nights with Lucy (the wife) in the waiting room of ICU.  It was nice to see a familiar face and to finally meet her husband.  It is nice to know more of their story and to know that at least for now, they are getting a happy ending to all of this, too.

I got there just a few moments before Uncle John, Aunt Cheryl and their daughter Laura.  We shared laughs and ice cream while sitting around Mom's bed in lawn chairs.  After about 30 minutes Mom was whisked off to "a physical therapy class".  I say "whisked" but that is a term for something that happens quickly.  That might have been the wrong word.  They brought Mom a manuel wheelchair and Mom had to use her arms to push herself to rehab.  She did a wonderful job! (Better than I thought possible less than a day from moving out of the hospital.)  Avery, who loves to walk slowly, walked all the way to rehab beside Nina and even got to push the buttons in the elevator.

We all got to go with her to the class and see her throw balls at a velcro wall with Avery, look at fish, and other things....

I am so glad Mom is in rehab now!  She is being evaluated and will be given a "plan" on Wednesday.  

Rules:  This new place will let anyone visit - even children and babies.  As long as Mom is not too distracted, you can stay with her no matter what she is doing with therapy.  (Showers are given in the evening and Mom will ask you to leave for those, though.)  

All visitors have to leave by 9 pm.  This is actually great for Dad!  He cannot spend the night with her and has been able to go home and get some sleep.  This way he will be able to rest up before Mom comes home.

For those who are visiting - Mom is in the "Baylor Institute of Rehabilitation"  it is directly across from the Truett building on Gaston.  And - to make everything easy to remember - they put Mom in room 325.  Funny, but that was the same room number from the Truett building.  

Did I mention - Heidi's here?  Thanks to my Sunday school class for flying her in!  Ethan and I really enjoyed a weekend of not worrying about Mom as much and focusing on our family who - on all accounts is growing much faster than they should.  (Luke, who just turned 3 months this week - is wearing 6 to 9 month clothing!)  Thank you for giving us a week to catch up!  It gave us some breathing time and now we are ready for a new week! 

Enjoy your Sunday!  More later! 

Moving Day

A quick update...Debbie was moved to the Baylor Institute for Rehabilitation late this afternoon. She had run a fever earlier in the day but was well enough to move on. Heidi made it in earlier this evening and her and Dick were at the hospital tonight. Amy and I were able to go and spend some time with the "young marrieds" of our congregation tonight. It's the closest we've had to a date in a while. We had a good time and it was good to catch up on happenings outside of our little world. We will have more to report tomorrow.

A New Step

It looks like they will move Mom to Balor Rehab tomorrow. Everything is good for now.

The road divides...

Last night after my blog post, Daddy and I discussed what the doctors have been talking with Mom about.

Mom is going to go somewhere soon (a few days). She will either go to rehab or she will go to a skilled nursing facility. We all pray that she listens to her doctors and does what they ask. We want her to get out of bed and begin to walk and take care of herself.

If she doesn't, she will end up at a skilled nursing facility.

Medically, she is doing well. Let's all pray for her to want to begin to walk and get better.

Pray for Daddy, too.

"The One Good Thing About Today"

Today is Wednesday.  Ethan, bless him, has the kids at home.  I was able to come to the hospital and spend some time with my Mom by herself.  

I have spoken before about not knowing exactly what to talk about with my mom lately.  Tonight I didn't have any trouble at all!  I walked into the room and while I was washing my hands at her sink I asked her, "Mom how was your day?"  To which mom replied, "Well it was good and it was bad."  

Mom proceeded to tell me many things about her day.  She talked about how the nursing staff was not quick enough. (I am checking into this. I am sure it is fine, though.  Mom cannot really tell how much time passes right now.) She talked about one nurse that calls her "Debra".  She said that that was not her name and if she was going to call her that not to expect an answer.  Mom talked about physical therapy and how everyone told her she was going to rot in the bed if she didn't get out.  She talked about last night and how her head hurt so bad it was intolerable!  She couldn't lay her head down at all.  She spoke of Daddy snoring.  She also said that if she held her head up on her own the whole room would spin.  The whole time she was complaining, happiness continued to build up inside of me until I began to laugh.  I am not good at hiding my feelings. 

I was watching my mom talk quickly with a voice just a little louder than a whisper get animated.  I was trying to remember the last time she told me about her day and thought that it must have been the Friday of January 16th as I was driving home from school.  I noticed how her eyes focused on me and other things in the room.  I watched her gestures as she told me about things she was agitated about.  I smiled as I imagined the staff interacting with my mom who was really grumpy and thought how it must have been difficult for them and for my mom.   Aunt Cheryl called while we were talking and Mom said, "....and Amy is just sitting here laughing at me."  

I think all of the complaining is a good sign.  Mom is getting better.  She feels so good that she is bothered by things.  I think it would be a great time to pray for Daddy.  

Mom had a CAT scan this evening.  It may have been a routine one.  Mom and Aleta (Mom's friend who visited with her today) thought it might have been to check lumps under Mom's arms.  Mom says that she has had these bumps for years.  The doctors seemed to wonder earlier today if they could be blood clots or complications of Factor 5.  I will ask Dad and post tomorrow more information.  

Mom spoke again about rehabilitation.  I am not sure when she will go.  I will check with Daddy on that, too. 

Mom should have a good night.  Omar is one of her favorite nurses.  He is here tonight.  

After Mom was finished complaining, she laid her head down and closed her eyes.  I wasn't finished with her yet.  When we began the discussion about her day Mom said, "Well it was good and it was bad."  I wanted to know what happened that was good.  

Mom said, "You came to visit."  Then she closed her eyes.  

I smiled.  

PT: Physical therapy or Pain and Torture?

I (Ethan) was able to make it up to Baylor this morning to visit Debbie. Luckily, the occupational therapist was there trying to convince Debbie to sit up in bed. She had been doing so for 15 minutes and Debbie had not budged. We both talked to her about how important it was for her to get up and get moving if she wishes to achieve her goals. She was being very good about redirecting the conversation toward other things, like her grandkids, the food, whatever, as we kept trying to encourage her to slide her legs to the edge of the table. It was during this exchange that I had a Grandma Smith flashback. Debbie's mom would some times do similar things to throw us off of what we were attempting to get her to do. (I'm secretly hoping that Debbie never reads this particular post)
Well, after some coaxing she did in fact sit up at the side of the bed and do a few stretches for her arms and back. She didn't want to stretch her neck at all since she can feel the shunt tubing where it runs from her neck to her back. She also gets dizzy and nauseous if she moves her head much. She has gotten very weak and deconditioned from lying in bed for 5+ weeks. After the OT left, I was telling her how important it was to move and what benefits she would receive from being more active and what risks she keeps by not moving. Debbie stopped me and told me she had already had this lecture today. Three times. :-) I couldn't help but laugh.
After all this she was able to eat a little lunch, though she was interrupted 3 more times in short order by nurses and dietitians. She ate her soup and a roll and seemed fairly tired after that. I had to leave to go to work and saw her physical therapist in the hall. I was disappointed since she was going to see Debbie soon and I couldn't stay any longer. I told her I would be back Thursday morning and hopefully we can talk more and I can observe/help the PT. I have a feeling she didn't have much luck this afternoon getting Debbie up.
All that said, Debbie looks well. She laughs, she gets aggravated, she's ready to get out of the hospital, and she's talking about Dick, her girls, and her grandkids constantly which I take all as signs she is recovering well from her surgeries. Now if we could just get her out of bed.....

Monday, Monday

A quick Ethan post...Debbie had a good day by all reports. Her fever has not returned, she was somewhat talkative, and if being somewhat combative is a sign of improvement then we can add that to the list as well. She also had her IV's removed today. Now this has more to do with them not working and the medical staff not being able to start a good IV line than with significant improvement. However she has had no difficulty taking oral medication so they feel fine giving her her meds orally for the most part. Also, her liver seems to be be better, not great, but better than the past few days. The liver damage appears to be from just the volume of medications it has had to process. Hopefully, the liver will repair over time, luckily its the one major internal organ that can regenerate. A therapist of some sort came by today, not sure if physical or occupational but assuming physical by the sound of it, to get Debbie up and out of bed for a few minutes. This didn't go very well, she was dizzy and felt nauseous  when sat up and refused to stand or move much at all. She invoked the "my son in law is a PT and he will take care of me" statement that I'm sure will make me a hit on 3rd floor Truett. I'm planning on stopping by in the morning to encourage Debbie and talk to the PT and/or OT if I can catch them. Amy said she will post more tomorrow when she gets a chance.

A Sunny Sunday

Today my dad wore green to church.  When he came over to the hospital and walked into the room it was like Spring had arrived.  The green reminded me of March and Spring and Daddy was in a great mood.  

It has been wonderful to see my mom and dad together so much.  Usually, when Daddy is at the hospital I am not.  We are trying to give each other time to be away while still giving Mom a family member at the hospital.  Today, I did get to stay with them both a little.  

When Daddy walked in, Mom had me working to keep her beautiful.  Before the hospital Mom would go to the beauty shop often.  This was something she never did when I was growing up.  It was a treat that she began when her mother was living with them.  Grandma Smith would have her hair done each week.  She would also get her nails done.  Sometimes, Mom would get her nails done too.  What was then a treat has now become a habit for Mom.  I will tell you, I am not good at being a spa person, though.  I didn't even have the correct music to play - only an Alan Jackson CD that we had already listened to for "church."  I will do better next time.  

Back to Daddy - he walked in and came directly over to Mom.  He greeted her with one of his "Hi, Good-lookin!" comments and gave her a kiss.  Just with them talking small talk Mom's face lit up and color returned to her.  She had blush on her cheeks and she looked radiant!  I am so very glad my mom and my dad love each other! 

Mom had a good day.  She saw many doctors.  We didn't see the liver doctor, though.  They even ran tests on Mom, but through it all today she was positive.  She only had one little frustration that she told a doctor all about - and that was that she wasn't sure she was getting to know her grandson Luke.  She worried that he was changing so much and she was missing it.  She commented that Avery knew who she was, but Luke didn't.  

About three hours later, I brought her Luke.  Avery and Ethan went to an outside 4 year old birthday party.  Luke couldn't attend because it was a bit cold to keep him outside for awhile.  SO - we just happened to find our way back to the hospital.  

Mom enjoyed seeing him, but was frustrated that she couldn't hold him very well.  Her arms would get tired quickly.  We tried putting pillows up under him and turning him around to rest on her legs, but nothing worked.  She did marvel at his size - (14.5 lbs three weeks ago) and she enjoyed the talking and singing he did for her.  

Tonight, Mom is with Daddy.  She asked to wash her face and brush her teeth with things from home instead of hospital things.  When she did, she felt even better.  Her fever never returned today.  We are hoping this is a good sign.  

For this week Mom will work on getting up and moving.  She sat in a chair today for 30 minutes.  She will do that and also do things like walk.  It will not be an easy week for her, but we are hoping that she will find the strength to do it.  

Awoken by Dr. Spock

At the hospital we are awoken by many people at all hours of the night. Nurses mostly, then around 3 am people will come to get Mom's blood to run tests on it before the doctors arrive around 7am.

This morning at 7:15 I was sleeping so soundly (Mom, too) when Dr. Spock came into the room. I didn't hear him - which was strange, so when I first saw him, he was leaning over me saying "Good morning!" in a booming voice. This might startle some - even me, but Dr. Spock reminds me of my Uncle Chuck who lives in Kensington, MD. Dr. Spock is shorter than Daddy with broad shoulders and a loud, deep voice. He phrases things while explaining just like Uncle Chuck would. He also has some of the same facial expressions. Mom thinks so, too.

Dr. Spock is the doctor that is looking for the cause of the fever and also the cause of her liver issues. He talked about how it wasn't the Dilanton that hurt her liver. It must be something else. He said, "Now we are all scratching our heads and trying to figure out exactly what is damaging your mom's liver." Dr. Spock does exactly what Uncle Chuck would do if he didn't know something. He finds out more information. For this doctor, that means more tests.

Today Mom can look forward to more tests, mostly blood tests. Mom is dreading more blood tests. A lady was in here last night for 45 minutes taking a lot of blood. She not only had a few vials to fill up, she had 2 jars!

If the blood tests don't find what the cause is, we will have to do a liver biopsy. Dr. Spock is going to give it about another 24 hours. If he still doesn't know what is wrong - the liver biopsy will happen.

Mom is good this morning, though. After not smiling too much, she is laughing today. She is even checking out doctors for Heidi. Just in case Heidi wants to go on a date while she is here....

I went to the car and brought up an Alan Jackson CD for her. It is the "Precious Memories" CD. It has on it all of the old church songs we sung growing up. Mom and I are both currently missing singing like the kind you find at ACU chapel. The kind where it seems you are closer to heaven just a bit because every inch of the air is filled with music, emotion, and Christians - and of course bats - well at least at ACU. Now, Alan Jackson is a bit different because he uses instruments to sing. We don't. But, they are nice songs.

Enjoy church this morning and pray for Mom. Pray that Dr. Spock and his people find the cause of her fever and what is damaging her liver. Pray that Daddy is rested and can get work done while being with Mom. Help him feel like he is not spread too thin.

February 21 - Exactly one month

Tonight I am sitting in the hospital doing my best to type and to be quiet at the same time. Mom comments sometimes that I make too much noise as her "roommate" on the weekends. I do enjoy the quiet times at night in the hospital with my mom. Sometimes she doesn't have a lot to say.

During the day, quiet times when she is not sleeping bother me a little. I never know what to say and after a month of small talk, I have completely run out of things. It is difficult to talk about things like the weather to someone who hasn't been outside for a month. My children make it a little easier. I have stories of something they have done or said and Mom seems to like to hear about them most of the time.

My mom and I never had a problem thinking of conversations before this all happened. I would call her nearly everyday at 4:00 at least. When I would jump in my car to travel from school to pick up the kids at daycare I would have 10-15 minutes of Mom. Most of the time I would even call her back after I got the kids securely in their seat belts.

Let's review what happened this week:
Last Saturday - Mom had HUGE blood clots in her legs. The doctors did surgery and put a "filter" inside of her largest vein at the point where the two leg veins come together. I think it is called the "IVC".

Sunday, Feb. 15 - Mom rested from surgery and got a fever. She didn't take most of her medications on Sunday afternoon. We thought this might help to cause a fever. At one point I was worried they would reschedule her surgery on Monday because of fever. They didn't. Thanks to all who visited Sunday. Daddy and I had weird schedules and missed each other. Mom was without one of us for a couple of hours. We didn't like it one bit, but thanks to visitors - Mom was not alone.

Monday Feb. 16 - Mom had surgery to put in a shunt permanently. This will help the fluid in her skull drain into her stomach if it is too much. It is controled by a remote. Although we are very disappointed that she has to have this - the technology seems cool to me.

Tuesday through today - Mom has been continuously running fever. Her fever gets to about 104. Daddy says it goes up and down. The doctors search for a cause doing things like a spinal tap to check for meningitis, sonograms for heart and abdominal areas, and take LOTS of blood - as far as we know nothing seems out of the ordinary.

UNTIL - this morning we have word that they think her liver is damaged from a medication she took to prevent seizures. Dilanton. They stopped the Dilanton about 3 days ago. This medication can cause fevers in patients, too. We should see improvement with fever in about 3 days. They are predicting that the liver will regenerate. Until we find out if this is the cause of her fever for sure, the doctors continue to run an assortment of different tests on all parts of her body.

Mom doesn't eat much. She will drink. She doesn't want to get up out of bed. Even if she did, she can only go as far as the chair to sit up. Her blood clots continue to hurt her. She is taking blood thinner, but they are so large it will take awhile for them to go away. This week has really seemed to set us back. It looks like we will be in Baylor for a little bit longer while Mom heals.

Although all of this sounds horrible - and it does seem that way to us, too - there are blessings coming from all of this. Mom and Dad are reconnecting with old friends. We all are learning not to take anything for granted. Our priorities have been adjusted. I think my dad, sister and I are a little bit closer and we count our blessings often. I am sure there are more things, too.

God will not give us anything we cannot handle - and he is with us every step of the way on this long seemingly impossible journey with my mom.

Thank you for your prayers and everything kind you have done for us. You continue to help us to keep on going.

No menengitis!

Mom's spinal tap is okay.  She doesn't have menengitis!  This is good news. 

Now - Please continue to pray for the doctors as they try to find the cause of her fever.

Spinal tap

Mom will have a spinal tap this morning to check for infection in her brain. 

Please pray that they can find the infection and they can help to heal Mom.

More later today.

Rest for the weary...

Hello all, Ethan update tonight. There isn't much to report today. Debbie pretty much just had a day, not a great day, not an awful day, just a day. She was pretty tired and slept from 1 to 4 this afternoon. She wasn't as energetic or talkative today, but hopefully some rest will do her some good. Please pray that she gets the rest that she needs to heal her body and mind. Also, continue to pray for rest for Dick and Amy. They are spread thin and tired and need rest as well. We are so appreciative of all that has been done for our family. The visits, food, cards, calls, and most importantly prayers are a testimony to your love for us and for how important Debbie is to us all.

Mom whispers.

I hurried to the hospital as fast as I could today after work. OF COURSE, I had to stop at a technology meeting first that ran from 4:00 to 5:47 and then I had to make two stops. One stop was to get 2 large boxes from Fed Ex to do clay animation and then one stop at Schlotzsky's to get Daddy and I dinner. THEN - I was quickly traveling to the hospital when I ran into an accident. I waited and waited and waited and finally was escorted off the interstate and onto another one by a police officer. (I was not the only one escorted. I was with about 100 or more cars....) So, my "quickly getting to the hospital" took me about 3 hours. At least I am here and safe.

Mom looks a little sad today. It was the first time I had seen her since Sunday - before the shunt surgery. I was kind of taken aback when I walked into the door because the right side of her head was covered in stitches. She has the original ones from the surgery several weeks ago and then another U shaped line about 3 inches from her ear going towards the back of her head. I have not counted her stitches. I don't think I want to.

After being with Mom for a bit, I didn't notice the stitches at all. I have decided she might need a haircut, though when she feels up to it. We even talked about hats. I spotted some the doctors were wearing - kind of like scrub hats. They were colorful hats. I think the website for them is www.skyscrubs.com. I am going to check that out with Mom as soon as I finish blogging. Mom said she wanted a really colorful hat. I am not sure I can see her wearing a really colorful hat. Usually my mom just likes blue (her favorite color) or red (her dad's favorite color).

Mom worked with the physical therapist today. She sat in a chair and did more arm and leg exercises.

Mom has fever of 102.7. The nurse just gave her more antibiotics through the IV and also some other medicine to reduce fever.

Mom is on the third floor of Truett. Mom whispered "Hi" to all of you.

Goodnight!

Information

You might have noticed that sometimes I don't have a lot of information to share with you.  I try to go to the hospital as much as possible.  Last weekend, I was able to live there...  During the week I am only able to go on Wednesdays, and Fridays.  Ethan and I have decided it is best not to take the kids.  It is hard for me to visit and they might catch a cold or something.  

We are lucky to have friends who are able to look after Mom during the days while we cannot be there because of work.  Daddy stays week nights and I stay Friday and Saturday nights.  Yesterday, I called Sandra (Mom's cousin) and asked how the day went.  She and her mother, Emogene, stayed with Mom yesterday.  I got an e-mail from Emogene today.  This is how yesterday went in her words:

"I am sure you know that Debbie is back in room 325 Truett.  I think she is a little glad to be in a familiar room.  She did really well yesterday.  She didn't complain about the shots except for the morphine.  I think she wanted to visit instead of sleep.  I tried to tell her that her body needed rest but she didn't pay much attention.  

She did her exercises for her arms really well.  She raised them and lowered them really well.  She also did everything they asked her to.  Karen told me this morning that her arms were hurting her.  She raised both arms about 10 times.  She also pulled her knees up about 20 times each.  We were impressed.  Her coordination is so good."

I am envious of the time everyone gets to spend with Mom and see her progress.  I am thankful that we have friends who can help us in this way, though.  Mom is making progress.  She continues to amaze me.  What is this - the 26th day or so and she has come so far!

I get to go and see her tonight!  I cannot wait.  (But, I will have to.  I have a meeting to attend - and THEN I will get to go.)  THANKS to my wonderful husband who is watching the kids for me tonight!  I love him so much!  

Loctation

Mom is on the 3rd floor of Truett in ICU.  I am not sure if there is a room number - just ask someone at the desk when you get off the elevators.

I will update more after I talk with Daddy today.

Mom is out of Surgery

Mom is out of surgery.

The surgery went well. The fluid that had built up in Mom's head over the past week or so was very great. So great - that it could have killed her, but fortunately, the fluid found more places to go (like between skin and skull) and didn't build up more than Mom could tollerate.

Mom will be moved to an ICU room. We are not sure which one yet. She might be on the 4th floor of Roberts like before - or she might move to the ICU on the 3rd floor of Truett. I will let you know later this afternoon. If you visit, check both places.

Summary - Mom really needed the surgery today. She got it and for now everything seems fine. Keep praying. Daddy seems to be having an okay day. (It might be a better one if Mom didn't have to have brain surgery today.)

I will try to post more this evening. Sorry about the short post. I am on a lunch break.

Surgery - Monday

Mom is in surgery now. They took her about 10:30 am. I will let you know when I hear something from Daddy.

He said it could be about 2 hours before they tell him anything.

This surgery is to put a permanent shunt inside her head running down to her stomach.

Daddy is at the hospital today. Mom took all of her medicine last night and this morning!

Eat Your Peas

....and take your shots!

"Eat Your Peas" was a quote book that Aunt Cheryl (Mom's roommate from ACU) got her as a gift. It has several encouraging quotes to get through the day.

"And take your shots" was added by me. We have been saying it all of the time lately.

Mom still needs prayers. She is still refusing to take IVs and medicine. Daddy and I spoke to her about the importance of all of the shots. We encouraged her to let the doctors do what they are supposed to do.

The surgery went well yesterday. It was a surgery to help block blood clots from getting from her legs to her heart and lungs. It was not a long surgery and so far she has not shown any complications from it. She is still on bed rest though, because the clots in her legs are so large.

Tomorrow Mom will have surgery to put a permanent shunt in her head that will run down from her head into her stomach. The surgery will happen around 10ish in the morning. Aunt Cheryl will stay with her tonight. After three nights of rest at home - Daddy will stay with her again tomorrow night.

Please pray for Daddy to have happy days (still not one today) and for Mom to do what the doctors say.

Thanks for the visits today!

Heidi to the Rescue

Sisters are great - aren't they?? Tonight I was reminded that mine is wonderful!

A bit of background -

Last night around 10:00, a man came into mom's room to draw blood to check her antibiotics levels. She is on a high dose of antibiotics and she has to have the levels checked so she doesn't turn "toxic." The man was not the calmest person I have ever met. He was tall and dark headed and didn't speak English in the same dialect that we do - so he was difficult to understand. I had been out of the room to walk Daddy to his car and then I came back up to the room with things from home for Mom.

The man said he had been in there a long time (impossible - because we were not gone long), and he was getting very impatient. He would begin to get Mom's hand ready to draw blood and just before he would stick her with this huge needle she would jerk her hand away and whisper "NO!" as loudly as she could. The policy - and maybe law- is if the patient refuses to give blood - they cannot take it. So after about 45 minutes, two nurses, bribery, and threats, the man retreated and rushed off to find all of the patients that he was in a hurry to get to.

The man was really scary, though. He paced the room, talked extremely quickly and almost yelled that he needed this test done right now because doctors and other patients were waiting on him. The nurses and I were watching him and trying to be calm for Mom. Nothing worked. Then, we got Mom quieted down and the man came back a second time to try again. He had me convinced that they could only run the test last night and if she didn't get it she could be very, very, very sick. Well, I was on pins and needles anyway with the clots in Mom's leg and Mom being on bed rest. I didn't need the extra worry. She didn't take the test and the man left. The only thing it taught Mom was that - she could refuse and there was nothing that we could do.

You might think Mom is refusing because the needle was big or because she was afraid it would hurt. When I asked her it was because she didn't want to be stuck again. She wanted to be left alone. "All they do is wake me up, turn on the lights, and STICK me!" (This is what she continues to tell us.)

In the morning (5:00 am) another man came to draw the blood for the same test and Mom didn't give him any problems. She was hardly awake until after he took the blood. Lucky for him. I heard about how he woke her up and didn't even say anything - all morning. He did say something, I just don't think she was awake to hear it. At least the test was done.

Fast forward through surgery to prevent the blood clots in her legs from breaking off and getting to her to tonight.

Daddy was here all day with his older brother (Uncle Bobby - from Kansas) and Dad's nephew Spencer. I went home in the afternoon after surgery to get a shower, see my family, and take a nap to get ready for tonight.

Daddy left around 8:30, I think from the hospital. He was going to wait until I got there. He encouraged me to not get to the hospital before 9:00. I got here about 30 minutes late - so we missed each other by about an hour. I am not sure why he left early. He did tell me when he called to tell me they left - that Mom refused to take her blood thinning shot. (This is a shot I had to give myself twice a day during my pregnancy with Luke. I was frustrated. Yes, it burns - but if I can do it - she can.) I promised to call him when I arrived at the hospital and was safe inside Mom's room.

I get here and the nurse meets me in the hall. Not only does she not want to take her blood thinning medicine - she is refusing to take her insulin. It is not a horrible sugar level - yet - but it is not good that she is not doing what she needs to do.

Well, at this point I feel pretty helpless and it gets worse. I called Daddy to tell him I was at the hospital and Mom wouldn't take her insulin either and ask if he had any ideas. That is when Daddy told me he was under I-20 and Hwy 67 and Uncle Bobby had a flat tire and they were trying to change it without a wrench. Needless to say - Dad told me to tell Mom to take her medicine and not to refuse it. He was frustrated, too.

I called Ethan and about 5 minutes into the conversation Daddy calls back and says, "Hand the phone to your mother." I do and he tells her just a minute of something and the phone goes dead. His phone. Daddy told me earlier that Uncle Bobby doesn't have a cell. So I am imagining my dad, Uncle Bobby, and Spencer on the side of the road at night trying to change a tire with no phone. I called Ethan.

Ethan tells me not to go looking for Dad. They are three men all over 6 feet tall. They can do this by themselves. I really think they are in two cars anyway. If they need something, they can go in Dad's car to get it and then come back. Ethan told me to stay at the hospital because I really cannot do anything. He couldn't do anything either. Avery and Luke are asleep and Avery has been sick all day.

So, after talking to a friend - I decided to call Heidi. Who else to help make Mom take her medicine. Heidi talked to me for a bit, asked me to talk with the nurse again, and then talked with mom. Between the two of us (it was mostly Heidi) - Mom took both of her shots.

Then I told Heidi to call Dad and text me when he got home. Daddy is not home quite yet. She did talk to him. He must have just had a bad connection earlier and now is fine. He got Uncle Bobby's car fixed and is now on his way home.

As you can see - I have no idea what to do or how to help my parents. Many of you ask what you can do to help us - and I have no idea. I don't even know exactly what I am supposed to do. Thank you for all of your support. The prayers, calls, cards, and all of the help has been amazing. I have also noticed that sometimes - even when I didn't know I needed something - I turn around and just what I need is there - like a snack in Mom's room, dinner for Ethan and the kids on a night I was up at the hospital, money for parking...

You guys have been amazing and we wouldn't have the strength to do what we are doing without you. Thank you so much for your help. Please pray that Mom decides to be more cooperative and that Daddy has better luck with everything he does.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Happy Valentine's Day

Ethan bringing you another update. I'm guessing I'll pick up more of the updates since Amy has gone back to work. Yesterday, we were made aware of the need of a permanent shunt to be implanted as well as the development of several blood clots in both her legs. The left leg in particular has several large clots from the hip down past the knee. Several doctors were consulted about the clots and it was decided that Debbie will have a procedure around noon. A vascular surgeon will implant what amounts to a net or cage of sorts to catch the clots in her legs. He will enter through her jugular vein and snake his way down to the legs then place the device. Generally,  the surgeon would enter in through the femoral vein (inner thigh/groin area) but since she has clots in the area he will try and disturb the legs as little as possible. This is a short procedure, about 20 minutes, and is pretty common but as we say in health care "Minor surgery is when it's on someone else, major surgery is when it's on me". Debbie is scared and is dreading this and all procedures right now, all the way down to having meds administered. I'm sure she is tired of being a human pin cushion. Please pray for her and the rest of the family. On a side note, be praying for Avery as well as she has a stomach ailment of some sort today. I'll try to update again this afternoon or early evening after the procedure.

Bumps in the road to recovery

A quick Ethan update at the end of the day. It's been a long week for all of us. Debbie has made tremendous progress and we have been very encouraged but today has been a more difficult day. First, Debbie will have a permanent shunt implanted on Monday. She continues to have an accumulation of fluid between her scalp and skull and the doctor feels its best to install an internal shunt to route excess fluid from the brain. This should be done Monday and will be about a 45 minute procedure. Debbie and Dick are discouraged by this but if it controls the pressure, then in the long run this should speed her recovery along and keep her ICP in a safe range.

The second concern is the discovery of several blood clots in both of Debbie's legs, more in the left than right. The doctors are keeping a close eye on this considering the genetic susceptibility that she has to developing clots. Amy is staying with her mother tonight and is very nervous about the clots. I told her this is exactly where she needs to be to monitor this and if any complication arises, they will be able to detect and treat it immediately.

Please pray for peace and rest for our family. Obviously this has taken a greater toll on Debbie than us, but the entire family is stressed, tired, and yearning for some normalcy.  We appreciate all that has been done for us and ask that you continue to pray for Debbie's speedy recovery.

These Hospital Booties Were Made For Walkin'...

An Ethan update to hold everyone over until Amy or Dick post later. I'm going a little off the reservation here, Amy is the natural blogger as everyone can see but I was excited so I couldn't wait any longer to post some news. I got to stop by Debbie's "non-ICU" room this morning, which I must say is very nice. I'm sure Baylor is charging more than appropriately for it. Dick was still there and continues to stay overnight. I hadn't been there long when it was bath time for Debbie. Dick and I went downstairs for coffee and were able to talk and reflect somewhat on the past 3 weeks. She has come so far and looks tremendously better from one day to the next. It's hard to believe what was done to her just 2 short weeks ago.

When we returned to the room, she was enjoying a visit with a friend. After a few minutes another knock at the door and it was Debbie's physical therapist coming to take her for a walk. I had secretly hoped to catch this occurance and was excited to see how she tolerated transferring out of the bed to standing and how her legs held up to a stroll. She had walked a few feet yesterday, to the door of the room and back to a chair next to her bed, so this would be her 2nd walk. Well, Debbie was extremely dizzy upon sitting up at the side of the bed and had to stay there for a few minutes to let this subside. While she was waiting for the room to stop spinning another knock at the door produced her brother, Kim. It was neat to see her face light up at the sight of her brother. So now we have a full audience for Debbie's performance where as yesterday none of us got to witness her walk.

Debbie was able to stand with what we would call "contact guard assistance", basically she did all the work and the PT just was there to make sure she was steady. I've been concerned about the strength on her left side, in particular at her left leg, but I'm happy to say she stood straight and steady and proceeded to walk, slowly and with a walker, out of her room and down the hall about 15 feet before turning and walking back. I'd say she walked about 50 or 60 ft. Her legs were steady though she complained of pain at her left calf and both feet but considering she's been off her legs for 3 weeks, that's understandable. Once her therapist discovered I was a PT as well, we got to talk shop for a bit and I got the green light to get Debbie moving. "The more the better" is what she said, which in our profession is like blood in the water for sharks. So I hope to show Amy and Dick some things we can all do for her and to get her to do for herself to strengthen her and build up her stamina. She should be able to move to the Baylor Institute for Rehabilitation soon once they have a spot for her, then it may be as soon as a week before she can come home the doc says. Anyway, God is good and today is a beautiful day in north Texas. Amy will probably post later tonight.

A Note From Dick

Hello everyone, this is Dick.  Debbie and I so appreciate your thoughts, concerns, calls and especially your prayers.  They have all been answered!!

Debbie is doing very well tonight.  She is beginning to work with speech and physical therapists. Dr. Biddewala said that when she can manage three hours of therapy a day she will be moved to a rehabilitation facility.  In all likelihood this move will occur late this week or early next week.  Dr. Biddewala anticipates she will stay in the rehabilitation facility about a week and then be released for home.

Debbie really enjoys her private room.  It is large, sunny and has a flat screen television.  The Baylor hospital staff is simply terrific.

Debbie's condition has greatly improved.  She does have a little bladder infection.  Also, some fluid remains between her scalp and her skull.  The doctor is treating the bladder infection. Debbie's head is wrapped to discourage the collection of excess fluid.  Please pray for improvement in these two areas. 

That is the news for tonight.  Thank you so much for concern and support!!!

the telephone call

I called Daddy as soon as I was done with school today.  I had tried many times today, but always the phone would go to voicemail.  He answered after about 4 rings this time.  

I asked about Mom.  He said that Mom was good.  He was on his way to go and see her after a few more stops.  We are expecting bad weather, so he will stay at the hospital tonight.  

He also told me about a phone call from earlier today.

Daddy was on his way to a Rotary meeting when his phone rang.  He answered it and the person on the other end of the phone whispers horsely, "Hello."  (It is Mom.)

Daddy says, "Well hello there dumplin'!"  

The conversation continues and Daddy eventually asks, "Is there anyone there with you?" (Remember - Mom moved to a private room last night that evidently has a telephone in it for her to use. )

Mom's whispered reply was, "No.  But I can hear voices outside the door."  

Dad then told her to expect whoever was out there to eventually come into her room.  

This is a retelling of the conversation that Daddy had today.   I am sure there were other things he edited out of his conversation retelling like how he told her how cute she was and that he loved her and missed her and wanted to get well.... I am sure he skipped these things because he didn't want to recount them to me.  But you all can fill in the holes.  I know he was very happy to talk to Mom again!  

What I am excited about - MOM CAN USE THE PHONE AGAIN!  Another blessing - she remembered Daddy's phone number!  Another blessing - he answered!

If you go and visit Mom, you can find her on the third floor of the Truett tower room 325.  

325

Mom is now in room 325 of Truett. I have heard it described (before anyone went to see it) as a type of ICU for neurology. Mom has her own room with a chair! The chair folds out into a "bed" and Daddy thinks he is going to stay in the room with her each night.

I didn't get too many details from Daddy. He was very busy visiting the hospital, driving down South to meet with a client and then back up to the hospital late tonight. I am sure I will have more details tomorrow into Wednesday.

If they moved Mom into a "room" then she must be doing well - right??

Ellen - if you want to add more in the comment section, please do. Every time I thought about calling I either couldn't because of work responsibilities or I didn't have your phone number on me.

School was wonderful today! I got back into the swing of things very easily. The children greeted me with hugs and smiles. It would have been a difficult day if I didn't like my job, but I really do. Sometimes I feel almost guilty for getting paid to do something that I enjoy so much!

Visitors

Heidi and Daddy spent the day with Mom today.  

I came up in the afternoon.  Ethan and I had spent another morning with the kids. We should have gone to church, but I couldn't get out of bed.  I have been going and going and my body just stopped.   I was so tired and couldn't seem to get enough sleep.  I had to get up every 3 hours to feed Luke - but other than that, I slept until 1 pm.  School begins for me tomorrow, so I need all of the sleep I can get so I can keep up with the 7 year olds! 

Ethan has been wonderful though all of this.  He takes care of the kids and the house while I try to take care of my mom.  Today, he wondered if my mom thought he wasn't visiting enough.  Funny thing, while we were discussing his visits to my mom (the last one being Thursday morning), Mom was at the hospital telling Daddy and Heidi that Uncle Kim (Mom's only brother) and Ethan had stayed with her all night.  Heidi and Dad didn't correct Mom.  Uncle Kim and Ethan are getting credit for visits they didn't even make!  We will talk with the doctor about this tomorrow.  

Other than unexpected nighttime visitors, Daddy and Heidi said Mom did great!  They said they had a wonderful time!  Mom was more tired today because of the busy day yesterday.  Heidi and Dad would often give her breaks to allow her to sleep.  

Good news - Mom got her shunt out of her head.  She is almost tube free!  This is one of the things she had to get out before moving out of ICU.  We anticipate that Mom will be moved to a regular room sometime between now and Wednesday.  

Heidi went back to Nashville.  She is expected back at the end of February.

Daddy will be at the hospital at 8:30 pm most evenings.  He will begin to stay with her overnight when she is in a regular room.  I will go see Mom on Wednesday, Thursday and Friday afternoon/evenings.  Thank you to all of the people staying with Mom during the day!  We are glad she has friends like you to check in on her throughout the day!  

Laughter is the best medicine.

For those of you waiting for a post today - sorry.  I am just now settled at home.  I spent the morning and most of the afternoon with Ethan, Avery and Luke.  Avery and I spent "girl time" at McDonald's for breakfast and then after picking up Ethan and Luke went to Chucky Cheese.  

Please don't think that all I take my kid to is fast food.  This was a day we planned to spend mostly focusing on Avery and paying attention to her.  We turned off cell phones, computers, and didn't do house work so that she would feel really loved.  We have been distracted the last few weeks.  

We thought about the zoo (our favorite place), but it was too windy to be outside with Luke today.  Then we thought of some other places like the Dallas World Aquarium, but that was too expensive for today.  So - we let Avery pick.  She saw a commercial for Chucky Cheese and wanted to go there.  Ethan found a coupon on the Internet.  He couldn't get our printer to work, but when we were at the restaurant he pulled the coupon up on his I-phone and they gave us the discount!  We paid 20 dollars for a pizza, 3 drinks, and 40 tokens.  Despite the loud atmosphere, pizza that tasted like cardboard, and the long wait to get in - all was good.  We visited while Luke slept the entire time!  

On to Mom.  I got to the hospital about 5:00.  I walked into the room and saw Mom smiling (many times) and even laughing at jokes!  This was a very good change from what I had seen during the week.  

At dinner I was filled in on the change.  Aunt Cheryl and Uncle John (roommates of my parents from ACU) got to the hospital at 9:00 am.  Mom smiled when Uncle John came into the room, but when she saw Aunt Cheryl, there wasn't much of a response at all.  (Remember - there is a reason to the "aunt" part of Aunt Cheryl.  Mom was such good friends with Aunt Cheryl from college on that mom called her a sister.  Mom thought of her as a sister that she never had.  So, we call her aunt.)  No response for this friend seemed really strange.  

The morning was filled with visits from Heidi and Daddy.  Others, too I think.  Then around lunch time Uncle John stepped out of the room to make room for The Singletons.  (Daddy roomed with Mike Singleton in college, too.)  When Aunt Cheryl, the Singletons, Daddy and Heidi were all standing around the bed (we were breaking serious rules here in ICU - we were only to have 2 visitors at a time), Mom began to smile.  I was told that her eyes sparkled, her face lit up and her whole body shook with laughter.  Mom also began to roll her eyes at teases from Uncle John and Daddy.   When I walked in her room at 5:00 Mom seemed to radiate joy.  

Karen House (my cousin) brought Mom a DVD player to add to the TV my daddy got her.  Karen even left an assortment of DVDs.  I found it funny that the very first DVD in the pack was NEMO, a Disney film.  My daughter watches NEMO at Mom's house all of the time.  Sometimes many times during the same day.  We don't have the movie, so Avery requests it when she is with Mom.  Before we all left for dinner (during shift change), we wanted to put a movie on.  We opened up the case and this movie was first.  I asked her if she wanted to watch it.  I got more giggles and a nod of her head that said no.  We finally settled on one and I found the correct channel and shoved it into the DVD player and pushed play.  Then Heidi and I were kicked out of the ICU room to make way for the nurses.  

As we were leaving I told Heidi that I hoped that was a DVD with "fast play" on it.  "Fast play" is on children's DVDs so that parents only have to push play once.  There isn't a menu screen unless you push the "menu" button.  The movie begins with the previews and then starts the feature presentation without stopping. Heidi didn't even know what this was.  We decided that the nurses would probably push play if she needed them to.  

At 6:00 pm we all left for dinner.  When we came back to Mom's room we heard music playing from the speakers of the TV.  I immediately thought - that was great timing - she must be watching the credits!  Then, I looked at the TV and noticed that the "menu" screen was on.  The nurses had not pushed play and Mom had sat there for 2 1/2 hours and just stared at the menu screen because she couldn't reach the TV.  At this point I asked Mom is she wanted me to push play.  She just motioned to turn it off.  The funny thing is that since she was in such great spirits from all of the laughter and visits she didn't seem bothered by the TV at all.  

Mom, Uncle John, Heidi, Aunt Cheryl and I all stood around Mom's bed.  We talked about plans for visits the following day.  We laughed (a lot) and Mom even shed a couple of tears (about Aunt Cheryl going home tomorrow.)  I enjoyed listening to Mom speak.  She chooses her words very carefully because her throat hurts.  She doesn't talk much so when did, everyone got very quiet and leaned in to listen.  Often she had to repeat herself anyway.  Most of the things she said I cannot remember.  I marveled at the progress she had made during the day with the help of her friends and laughter.  I felt like I wanted the moment to last a lot longer than it did.  One of the words I do remember is what she said to Uncle John as he kissed her goodnight.  Mom said, "Pray."  

"Pray."  This is a word we have used many times in the last weeks.  It is what Mom has needed the most.  When people called and asked what they could do for us - this was the only word that I could think of especially the day this journey began 18 days ago.  

As we all huddled around her bed holding hands, I peeked at Mom.  She was quietly looking at each of us.  I wonder what she was thinking.  I noticed that when Uncle John prayed for her quick return to playing with grand kids - she looked at me and nodded her head in agreement.  I felt more at peace in those few moments standing with my mom and family praying than I had since this began.  

Please continue to pray for my family.  Mom still has a long, long road ahead of her.  Daddy does too.  Thank you for all of the people who wanted to stay with my mom next week.  I have next week covered with several of her good friends.  If you would like to visit - you are more than welcome.  As I have seen today, friends and laughter seem to be the best medicine my mom can get.  Mom is still, for now, on the fourth floor of the Roberts building in Baylor Dallas.   

Heidi's home!

Thanks to Karen who graciously flew Heidi from Nashville to Texas for the weekend!!  

Heidi landed in Dallas at 5 pm.  She and Daddy went to eat with Karen because the ICU was shut down between 6:00 and 8:30.  They ate at Chewey's.  At 8:30 they all went back to the hospital to visit with Mom. 

Heidi said, "Mom looks 100% more like herself!  She looks GREAT!"

Daddy said, "What a fox!  She was doing well.  Her spirits were good.  She is doing fine.  She is doing much, much better than yesterday.  She was beginning to speak in whispers."  

I am not sure these words would be the exact ones that I would use to describe Mom.  But, she does look a lot better than she did just after surgery.  

Mom told Heidi she loved her.  Mom is whispering and seems to still have a sore throat.  

We will all go to the hospital and visit tomorrow.  Thanks for reading!

Choices!

I went to the hospital and was surprised to find Mom sleeping very well despite the noisy room with bustling nurses and under no sedation. I let her sleep.

She looks so much better without tubes in her nose and mouth. She still has an IV in her neck. She also still has the shunt from her skull. We will have to get the shunt out before moving out of ICU. I have not heard when that will be. Daddy thinks she might get it out sometime early next week.

Mom has a TV, thanks to Dad's request of one. At home she would have the TV on all of the time. I think the noise makes her feel good. She smiled today when she opened a gift from her best friend and college roommate - Aunt Cheryl. She is not supposed to keep anything with her in ICU, but I did hide a book under her sheets. She likes James Patterson so I brought her one of those.

Mom is able to eat whatever she wants. She quickly sent me down to the cafeteria in the hospital to get her homemade vanilla Blue Bell ice cream and a large iced tea.

Mom doesn't talk much. I asked the nurse how long it would take for her throat to heal after the breating tube. The nurse said it could be 5 - 10 days from the time they take it out. We are just on day 3. Mom did say, "I love you, too." It was a response when I told her I loved her. This was the first time she said those words in weeks! It really doesn't take much to make me happy right now.

Heidi is coming in tonight. (5 pm). I think she feels better after a week back home in Nashville. Daddy will pick her up and then head to the hospital. Heidi will also be at the hospital early in the morning to spend as much time as possible with Mom. Ethan and I are going to do something fun with Avery before I go back to school on Monday. I expect to be at the hospital in the late afternoon or early evening. I am not sure when Dad will get there.

As much as I have tried to publish the blog twice each day, this may not be possible every day. I promise that either Ethan or I will write at least once each day to let you know how Mom is, though. I am going back to work starting Monday, so the update may be written before I go to bed.

Thanks for all of the comments, calls, cards and prayers. The prayers seem to be working!